November 4, 2009

I purchased a new piece of the Internet today.

It is going to be the best thing I have ever put on the Internet ever.

Please hold for results.

November 3, 2009
I’ve had this sticker on my celing fan for some time thinking that one day someone other than my cleaning lady or roomate will see it… Finally it happened, my cleaning lady was sick last friday so her daughter came by the house and saw it (if you know what I mean (I mean she dusted my ceiling fan and saw it!))

I’ve had this sticker on my celing fan for some time thinking that one day someone other than my cleaning lady or roomate will see it… Finally it happened, my cleaning lady was sick last friday so her daughter came by the house and saw it (if you know what I mean (I mean she dusted my ceiling fan and saw it!))

October 31, 2009
Happy Halloween! To celebrate I am going to eat a lobster!!! What’s that Mom? Noooo, that can’t be a baby it’s in a pot and a chef is holding it. Oh really, hmm… ok. To celebrate I am going to eat a baby. What’s that Mom? Totally immoral and illegal? Hmm… ok. Agreed. To celebrate I am going to eat crunchy cheetos and crunchy reese peanut butter cups… … … and possibly that lobster baby.

Happy Halloween!

To celebrate I am going to eat a lobster!!! What’s that Mom? Noooo, that can’t be a baby it’s in a pot and a chef is holding it. Oh really, hmm… ok.

To celebrate I am going to eat a baby. What’s that Mom? Totally immoral and illegal? Hmm… ok. Agreed.

To celebrate I am going to eat crunchy cheetos and crunchy reese peanut butter cups…

…

…

and possibly that lobster baby.

October 29, 2009
October 27, 2009
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

hipstertracks:

lifeost:borgomani: Ben Gibbard & Jay Ferrar - One Fast Move Or I’m Gone

October 25, 2009
Due to a series of unfortunate circumstances this weekend has been cellphone-less. It’s interesting to live my life without knowing everything that is going on in the world of Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, and personal e-mails. I do know that it’s a life I could get used to, not because I dislike technology! I love technology! But, there is so much anticipation after you don’t have your e-mail for a while. I sit in my car wondering if there are messages in my inbox, or someone has tweeted @ me, or maybe someone has commented on a picture of mine on the facebook. I was driving to my home and was so excited by what may be waiting for me on the internet that I made a detour to my dad’s house for my internet based release… and was disappointed by what was waiting for me. In the words Paul Brown usually applies to me: My interest in what was going on in the internet had all hype and no follow-through…. that said, the 10 minute drive between my Dad’s and My house is going to leave me hungry for more of this… I feel dirty internet.

Due to a series of unfortunate circumstances this weekend has been cellphone-less.

It’s interesting to live my life without knowing everything that is going on in the world of Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, and personal e-mails. I do know that it’s a life I could get used to, not because I dislike technology! I love technology! But, there is so much anticipation after you don’t have your e-mail for a while. I sit in my car wondering if there are messages in my inbox, or someone has tweeted @ me, or maybe someone has commented on a picture of mine on the facebook.

I was driving to my home and was so excited by what may be waiting for me on the internet that I made a detour to my dad’s house for my internet based release… and was disappointed by what was waiting for me.

In the words Paul Brown usually applies to me: My interest in what was going on in the internet had all hype and no follow-through…. that said, the 10 minute drive between my Dad’s and My house is going to leave me hungry for more of this…

I feel dirty internet.

October 23, 2009
This is the best picture ever taken of me at work. My colleague misunderstood casual Friday and decided to make our relationship more casual by leaning on me for a long time. I opted for jeans instead, I’m the one on the right!!

This is the best picture ever taken of me at work. My colleague misunderstood casual Friday and decided to make our relationship more casual by leaning on me for a long time. I opted for jeans instead, I’m the one on the right!!

October 21, 2009
I did a search on Google to try and find a picture of a boy in a cat costume so I could do a blog post about how I am planning on dressing as a cat for halloween.Instead, I found this picture… and tried to put a narrative… out loud… to it for like a good five minutes before I realized that this isn’t something normal people do. My favourite one was where it only involves the boy with the black hair (billy) talking and cutting everyone else off! Scenario 1 (winner): Billy: You may think I look scared Steven, and maybe I do like scared… maybe I look scared because I AM scared. But, up until 10 minutes ago when I caught you two by the rock wall with your sailors handkerchief wrapped around your hands as they wrapped around each others I thought Debbie and I were in love. I Really did…. Steven: Bil… Billy: It is not your turn to talk Steven, do you see where my finger is pointing? Do you… or do I need to take off my kimono to better articulate the point. I’m pointing to the creek, as that is where the police are going to find your sagging beret and striped leggings. Whether they are covered in blood is still up to you… you can hold your hand close to your chest… and you can look at Debbie all you want… but she is scared because she knows what I’m capable of… She recoils because she knows there is reason to… now get out of my face before I get my fist into yours. (This continued for an absurdly long time, and Steven actually ended up tying up an overconfident Billy and securing Debbie in the end!) Scenario 2 (second place): Steven: Don’t worry Susan the boomerang landed… you can put your arms down… I think I see it behind you! Billy: Actually dude, I see it right behind you… Steven: Woah, that’s crazy! It must have went around like one and a half times! Billy: Yeah, nuts. This thing is crazy.

I did a search on Google to try and find a picture of a boy in a cat costume so I could do a blog post about how I am planning on dressing as a cat for halloween.

Instead, I found this picture… and tried to put a narrative… out loud… to it for like a good five minutes before I realized that this isn’t something normal people do.

My favourite one was where it only involves the boy with the black hair (billy) talking and cutting everyone else off!

Scenario 1 (winner):

Billy: You may think I look scared Steven, and maybe I do like scared… maybe I look scared because I AM scared. But, up until 10 minutes ago when I caught you two by the rock wall with your sailors handkerchief wrapped around your hands as they wrapped around each others I thought Debbie and I were in love. I Really did….

Steven: Bil…

Billy: It is not your turn to talk Steven, do you see where my finger is pointing? Do you… or do I need to take off my kimono to better articulate the point. I’m pointing to the creek, as that is where the police are going to find your sagging beret and striped leggings. Whether they are covered in blood is still up to you… you can hold your hand close to your chest… and you can look at Debbie all you want… but she is scared because she knows what I’m capable of… She recoils because she knows there is reason to… now get out of my face before I get my fist into yours. (This continued for an absurdly long time, and Steven actually ended up tying up an overconfident Billy and securing Debbie in the end!)

Scenario 2 (second place):

Steven: Don’t worry Susan the boomerang landed… you can put your arms down… I think I see it behind you!

Billy: Actually dude, I see it right behind you…

Steven: Woah, that’s crazy! It must have went around like one and a half times!

Billy: Yeah, nuts. This thing is crazy.

October 20, 2009

BJ BJ BJ BJ

  • Luke: Oh my, I am so very excited for Indian food tonight.
  • Kim: Yeah, I am excited for my first time at Nirvana... it should be pretty good.
  • Luke: I don't want to eat anything big for lunch at all so I can have enough room in my stomach for Mr.Vindaloo and his daughter Naan-cy.
  • Uttie: Yes, tonight is going to be a big night for Naan....cy.
  • *Group laughs about inside joke surrounding the fact we refer to naan bread as naancy*
  • Luke: I can't wait for Naancy to be old enough to go out for Naan-cy with me!
  • *Group laughs about inside joke surrounding the fact that I am going to name my daughter Naancy with an extra a due to my love for naan.
  • Kim: So where do you want to go for lunch?
  • Uttie: Well, I want to do something light...maybe I will take a BJ?
  • *luke gasps*
  • Uttie: Are you up for that?
  • Luke: Umm, what are you talking about...
  • Uttie: A BJ... BJ BJ BJ BJ BJ...
  • *Luke looks around the room to see if anyone understands what is going on... no one does*
  • Uttie: A boooooster juiiiccce!
  • Luke: Ohhhhhh! Uttie man, you can't shorten that to BJ. BJ means something completely different.
  • Uttie: Like what?
  • Luke: I'll tell you at lunch, but you aren't going to like it.
  • *Lunch Occurs*
  • Luke: ... and it's when it goes in the mouth.
  • Uttie: ohhhhh shooooooot.
October 18, 2009

Dear Bathroom Toilet,

Are you fucking kidding me? That was all I needed to do to make you quiet? I am shocked that it took so long for this to come out,  I really am. We have been together for almost four years now, and I thought I had tried everything to make you happy…  I wanted you to be happy so you would stop your persistent bi-weekly gargling.

I replaced the chain that pulls up the little stoppy thing, the stoppy thing itself, and even the black accordion like thing just to see if it could make you to stop making the noises you see fit to make (until I open your back tank and calmly pet your innards to calm you down). None of these things worked, and your persistence in gargling was infuriating.

The act of getting into your back tank was difficult. I had to move three candles and a box of tissues.. and then your little hose would squirt water all over me unless I held the lid of the tank in the exact right way… it was something I got used to doing but am very excited will never be done again.

As you know, two nights ago I was trying to get to sleep when you started making the noises that you do when you want me to come hang out. I was having a bad day, and was upset by your timing…it must have been weird for you to see me walk in with so much anger on my face, but I had had enough. I kicked you and I shook you and you stopped… I stayed still to see if my mind was playing tricks on me… but you had in fact stopped.

I am sorry that it came to violence, but I don’t regret shaking you. Making noise is not the right way to get attention, I will love you all the more if you just flush when I push the little knob and then fill back up with water afterwards.

I don’t want to shake or hit you again but I will if you don’t smarten up.

An optimistic,

luke vigeant.

COLES NOTES:

I found out that if I shake my bathroom toilet it stops trying to unnecessarily fill up the back tank when it’s already full. This is a pretty insignificant thing.

October 17, 2009
October 16, 2009

The device used to make this music costs only $25.

The first person to put this under my tree at Christmas gets a lot of respect.

October 14, 2009

YouTube fame and Friendships are an interesting thing. The video above is of two youtube musicians that are:

-in love, and

-in a YouTube focused band called Pomplamoose (they also have independent YouTube channels of their own)

The video posted above made it over 1.5 million views strong based on a combination of Twitter, Digg (and reddit), and word of mouth. I find it interesting that a single tweet by Ashton Kutcher effectively tripled the hits from their second most successful video.

Pomplamoose are now producing Julia Nunes, another popular youtube musician. Whose youtube success on this cover of Ben Folds’ Gone landed her the opportunity to open for him several for shows on his tour. Although I am partial to her Say Anything covers.

She was also most recently featured on popular internet comedy duo Jake and Amir. Who work on….coll…

I could keep going, but my point is that I find youTube fame and the relationships formed on it to be more interesting to follow than the plot lines on Bones.

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

The Most Serene Republic - Stay Ups

Tomorrow night will be serene - if you live in Toronto it can be for you as well.

October 13, 2009

@vigeant